Waygook Humor

When you come to Korea, you learn quickly that foreigners are a dime a dozen. If you thought you were the only one to have the idea to teach abroad/blog about it, think again. Most Koreans (and myself!) expect the foreigners they meet in Korea to be English teachers. Foreign English teachers are spread out over many small towns, rural areas, cities, and metro areas.

In Korea, I'm usually (USUALLY) impressed by the foreigners I meet as we are fairly like minded and often share in a specific humor, which I would like to call, "waygook humor." It's a mixture of making fun of yourself for being foreign, as well as the cultural differences/experiences which leave you laughing and sometimes completely confused. Of course, we have other things in common, but I really enjoy a good waygook joke from time to time.

Check out these sites to see what I mean. Waygooks, if you have any more suggestions, share the link in the comments section:

• Kikin' it in Korea - A waygook life in GIFs


• Clueless Waygook Memes - Guy wears a 위국인 (waygook = foreigner) t-shirt


• Sh*t ESL Teachers Say - The YouTube sensation hit Korea, too


• Sh*t Korean Girls Say - I showed this to my CT, she couldn't stop laughing

Still Laughing,
-Bets

My First Korean Wedding

In March, I was pleased to be invited to my friend and co-worker's wedding. I was very excited to see a Korean wedding as I had heard a lot about my co-teachers' weddings. Mr. Kim had talked about getting engaged in January and I thought it was great news, though I was sad to think that I would miss his wedding. Little did I know that the wedding would occur in March: only three months after the engagement.

In Korea, engagements don't last long. Most weddings are held in wedding halls, large buildings with multiple floors of ball rooms/conference rooms/buffets. The wedding hall staff does all the planning and the only thing the couples need to worry about is the guest list.

Mr. Kim's wedding was in a wedding hall next to the beach near his fiance's hometown. It was a lovely afternoon and I was looking forward to the festivities and reconnecting with staff members who had recently transferred schools.

After our old school staff congregated in the lobby, we gathered up our money to give to the groom and his parents. No one was to give gifts, just cash. It's customary in Korea for the couple to make a list of all the money they received. In the future, they will be expected to reciprocate/exceed the given money if any of their friends or family marry in the future. So, if I gave $50, they would be expected to give $50 or more to me when I get married.

Upon presenting our monetary gift, we were given meal tickets to the wedding hall's buffet restaurant. A bit confused, but still following my fellow teachers, I went into the restaurant and ate lunch before the ceremony. There were giant plates of sushi, kimchi, noodles, onion rings, and more! It was the biggest spread I'd ever seen in Korea. As I was eating, I realized that I could be eating with guests of Mr. Kim or with any number of guests from other weddings in the hall. Regardless, we enjoyed the food and then headed into the ceremony area.

It looked like any other hotel banquet room. It was gussied up with fake pink and white flowers, ribbon, and white satin cloth. The bride and groom were in their Sunday best, the families in traditional hanboks, and the rest of the crowd was a mixture of ripped jeans, business suits, and pencil skirts. Tables were set up beside the aisle for grandparents and elderly to sit. Everyone else stood on the perimeter and watched. Though watch is a loose term... During the ceremony, most people were chatting with others, texting/talking on their cell phone, meandering back and forth, and overall not paying attention. I didn't understand why people were even there. Didn't you want to see the wedding?

The ceremony started with the usual blessings and welcome speeches.  But then the emcee started to make the groom do embarrassing things, like take off his shoe and ask everyone for money throughout the room. It got more awkward as Mr. Kim was then forced to dance to an old Korean pop song as the crowd laughed with glee. And then it clicked...

There would be no reception. There would be no dancing. This was it. The wedding WAS the dollar dance. I felt cheated. Where was my dance floor? The toasting?

When it was all over, everyone posed with the couple for various prescribed group photos: family, extended family, co-workers, students, and friends. If you fit the category, you went for your picture. The process took awhile, but once our group picture was over, Mr. Kim looked straight at me and said, "Betsy, thank you very much for coming." I couldn't believe it. Of the 60 friends in his photo and countless other people before it, he turned to me and thanked me specifically.

With that, Mr. Kim and his bride were whisked away on their honeymoon and the rest of us hopped in our carpools for the afternoon drive home. It wasn't the day I was expecting, but I liked it all the same.

To the bride and groom,
-Bets

One Car, Two Car, Black Car, White Car

"Harry," said Dwayne. " I have some news for you: modern science has given us a whole lot of wonderful new colors, with strange, exciting names like red!, orange!, green!, and pink!, Harry. We're not stuck any more with just black, gray, and white! Isn't that good news, Harry?"

-Kurt Vonnegut, Breakfast of Champions

I am not an expert on car ownership in Korea, but the hoards of vehicles in this country is similar to the US. As home ownership is pretty rare, Koreans seem to use their cars as a status symbol. I chatted with a friend about dating in Korea, and she told me she checked  out guys' cars to learn more about them. She said she was very impressed by European imports (wealthy) and put off by small, colorful, Korean cars (poor).

In the US, people drive all sorts of cars from beaters to Beamers. Living in a town of 8,000, people knew I was driving by because of my car's make, model, and color. I was one of two people with the same car. Two. Our cars were unique and as for my younger demographic: our cars had more to do with function than form.

In Korea, people seem to stick to a pretty set list of car makes and models. Most of the young professionals I've met have bought new models of the latest Kia or Hyundai. Beyond similar models, they are all the same colors: grey, black, white, and tan. In a large parking lot, there may be one or two colored cars out of hundreds. Clearly, Vonnegut's words didn't ring true in South Korea.

A Korean friend tried to explain their reasoning for the color choices. They said that since VIPs and CEOs drive neutral colored European imports, the rest of the country thought their cars should mimic them with similar designs. I don't know if it's true, but something clearly stuck and continues to echo throughout dealership showrooms around the country.

So, how does this affect me?

In the small school parking lot there are about 12 vehicles. I've probably gotten a ride from each teacher at least once or twice. But, to be honest, if someone asked me: Where is the English teacher's car? I would have no clue. I know it's tanish-greyish...or maybe it's white? It has the blue foam bumpers on it (like most do). I could probably whittle the list down to 6 cars, but that would just be nixing the black cars in the parking lot. I consider myself pretty observant, and I just don't understand how this is so difficult. Parking lots are tricky places...

Vroom,
-Bets